From Ages 8-18

I did this as a Health Experiences assignment for uni, it got published and put up on display. I wonder how many people actually read it? Not many, I think.




They threw them at my face
The white coats,
In a tiny little jar they came
A thousand concoctions of chemicals
To make me sane
I’d take them every morning
And be subject to their prodding
“These pills will make you normal. They’ll help you. You’ll see”
‘Cause apparently I’m not normal.
They said it’s A.D.D

But I woke, my blood a little sleepy
These pills... they locked me away. Every inch of my existence
Feeling it change
They left me spinning in the memories
Of the person I used to be


So Mum took me back
To the men with all the charts
Said something was wrong
And I got a brand new jar

These ones sent these chills through my bloodstream
Kept me awake all night
Trying to conceal the sadness that welled up inside

They wouldn’t let me eat
It hurts to feel your ribs ache against your skin...
But I could barely fill my stomach
With anything



And I told them how I felt.
On those therapy chairs
I said, “I don’t remember myself,
My veins are leaking chemicals...”
But instead of stopping
And talking to me
They pushed more drugs
Into my bloodstream




So every week a brand new box
That sent my mind in vicious knots
Every synthetic emotion in the space of a day
Anger. Euphoria. Love. Pain



They still couldn’t fix me
And never knew why. How odd it must have been
An arrangement of chemicals
Couldn’t fix my mind?


“It must be you...”
I was always the reason why.
Words never failed, because they never tried
To ask me how I felt, to detangle my mind




So now I just dream of escaping
I’m outnumbered by this chemical army
Those white coats keep pushing into me
Swallowing these pills
That sleep my sleeps.
That dream my dreams.
That’s taken all the life
Out of me.